Not Desperate Enough...

No one seems to watch Desperate Housewives with me anymore. At first I thought it was me. But now after finally watching this episode, I have come to the conclusion that it is the show. I don't even want to watch it with me anymore. Here's why...

• Susan. Are you as bored of her as I am? Why didn't she just drown? Susan, Ian, and Mike. The drab three. I literally yawn when any of them are on camera. I mean we already know Susan is going to dump Ian's ass, take his money, and go back to Mike. Might as well fast forward to the next act.
• Edie and Carlos. No. Yuck! Although Carlos did always want a kid. Must delete.
• The Scavos are being destroyed! Lynette would not cheat, certainly not when Tom is literally flat on his back, and not with an ex-coke snorter. She can do better than that. The Scavos are the dysfunctional, love-hate, suburbia couple I aspire to be. You can't destroy them now. You already almost did that with Tom's demon spawn earlier.
• I am not sure Gabby has done anything useful since she convinced little wannabe models to turn bulimic. Her holier than thou stunt with the mayoral candidate was more juvenile than Season 1 Gabby. And his ultimately successful attempts to get her back were pathetic. I mean come on man! She stole you ex-wife's couture. Gold digging slut vs. power player politician. I would go for the latter, but then that's just me.
• I miss Bree! I miss her stepford wife-ish Breeisms. The way she can give you the verbal ass kicking of your life all without breaking a sweat or showing a frown line. I guess while Bree's daughter is having Austin's illegitimate child in Florida or whatever, Marcia Cross had her twins. Sadness. Bree/Marcia... come back before I give up on this show forever.

This show needs some major changes, starting with a real villain. I thought Orson would be it, but then they redeemed him. And now he is apparently just like his SATC alter ego, except he can get it up. Oh, and while you are finding a new villain Cherry&Co, it might be a good idea to dig up a real plot. The will she or won't she with Susan is getting really old, really fast.